Nothing to draw with

If you've never read My utmost for His highest by Oswald Chambers I highly recommend it. The book was given to me by my pastor, David Moore, when I graduated from high school. The daily devotional pretty much collected dust for the first ten years I had it. It had always been too convicting for me. For the last three years I have come to the end of me and decided to pick it back up again. I can't believe what a fool I was. I'm amazed on how we think we can fool God by hiding from our convictions. I guess for years I thought I could turn off God like a radio sermon or put him on a shelf like I did with this book.

Chambers amazes me on how he gleans so much from such as half a sentence of scripture. Today's entry is no exception. He says it better than I can so..."misgivings about Jesus start from the amused questions put to us when we talk of our transactions with God - Where are you going to get your money from? How are you going to be looked after? Or they start from ourselves when we tell Jesus that our case is a bit too hard for Him. It is all very well to say "Trust in the Lord," but a man must live, and Jesus has nothing to draw with - nothing whereby to give us these things.

Recently I am rereading Rebel with a cause. It's Franklin Graham's autobiography. When I was twenty something, Joni Qualls, a woman who went to church with my mom gave me this book. She said God told her to. She said she was walking on her treadmill when God spoke. I figured God really spoke or it was a low blood sugar level. I'll go with God.

I read the book. I wasn't a big reader. I think at this point in my life I had read about three books. That doesn't count all the jacket summaries I read in high school for book reports. (How did the English teacher know?) Anywho, nothing jumped out of me at the time.

Recently I've been obsessed with Islam. I'm driving my wife crazy with the documentaries I make her watch. I'm in the process of reading the Koran with a blog commentary. Recently in my search for all things Islam I came across The devil came on horseback. It's about retired marine captain Brian Steidle that became an unarmed military observer of the cease fire in Sudan. I know as Americans we are bombarded with so many save Africa campaigns that we have become numb. However, Steidle's pictures spoke to me. That lead me to pick up Rebel with a cause again. Franklin speaks of an idea called Godroom. He learned from a man named Bob Pierce. Bob taught him that God will only work when we have reached the limit of our capabilities. He says that if he senses that God has showed him a need that needs to be met, he has to step out in faith and allow God room to work. Chambers really speaks to that point today. I'm not sure where God is calling me. My wife and I have talked about traveling the world. We both agree that we can't use missions work as an excuse to fulfill our geographic fantasies. That wouldn't work. However as I watched Steidle's documentary I couldn't help but have the desire to pick up my rifle and my bible and head to Sudan. One point in the documentary really moved me. Brian and his sister were talking with an older gray headed gentleman who looked like he was 70, but probably around 50. He was crying as he thanked Brian for what America has done to help. "You are the only ones who come, " he said. "We are muslim and no muslim country ever comes to help." His gratitude is what makes me want to help. Of the many sins listed in the bible, ungratefulness is listed right along with adultery and drunkenness. I believe that is our biggest sin in America. God has blessed us and we have forgotten to thank Him. I'm so sick and tired of America being portrayed as the bully. Yes, we aren't perfect, but I still believe we are a light on the hill for the world. If you don't believe me just wait. The day is coming when America will be no more. Hindsight will truly be 20/20.

Whether we are forced to go oversees because of discord here or if we simply hear the call I don't know. God has blessed me and my family immensely. I don't believe God blesses us with seed so we can store it. We are to spread it out and tend to it and watch it grow. God has blessed us here in America like no other nation in history. Hopefully we will scatter the seed before he scatters us.

Dumper Update

I found a phone number on one of the bills I found, so I called it. The woman who answered sounded much too old to be a wife or girlfriend so I'll assume it was mom, although I did hear a baby in the background. She seemed suspicious or maybe even wary at first. When I asked to speak to (Let's call him Bob) she acted as though he was right there. I told her my first name only and then she said he wasn't there. I played the innocent and said that I had found some of Bob's things along the road and thought that he might want them back. Overly elated she thanked me for calling. I knew we were speaking the same language. I explained where the trash was. She said that he used to live by there, and the person that moved into his old house probably found some of his stuff and they were the ones that dumped it in the ditch. Yes, this must be true. It was a setup. The new owners convienently placed the bills with Bob's info on it to throw the bloodhounds off the trail. She then continued to thank me for calling and I continued to act concerned about Bob's heirlooms in the ditch. She then said that Bob wouldn't be back for a while (hmmmm, jai...naaa). She said with a very pity-seeking tone that maybe she could come get the stuff. She then skipped hinting around and asked me if I could just pick it up (and I might and then bring it to her only to get a pic). However, I will give them time and see what happens. I've pondered send out a calling schedule to concerned citizens who could take turns calling and letting them know they found Bob's stuff. For now I'll give them a chance.

Takin' a dump

I'm not by any means a radical environmentalist, but there are certain eco violations that just piss me off. Dumping your crap along the road is one of them. I live in a rural area and I have pulled more than my fair share of trash bags out of the creeks and ditches than I'd like. I always put on the latex gloves, open them up and see if I can find the long lost owner. I've had a couple of gold strikes in the last couple of days that need to be shared with the world. If I can figure out how to do it, I'll be posting a wall of shame for my local dumpers.

I have to admit that of all the trash I've picked up, most people are smart enough to remove anything with their name on it. One person even took the time to cut out their name and address from several bills. I can almost admire that. Hmmm, I wonder if they put that much effort into it if it would be easier to just burn their trash or call a disposal service? But hey, I have yet to soar to their depths of thought. I suppose that I could give them the benefit of the doubt that it fell off their truck. Nah.

By the time I get to Phoenix

Yesterday was a rough day. I'm probably going to have to stop listening to talk radio. I was rolling out a bale of hay and had a thought. Wouldn't it be great if all I ever had to think about was feeding these cows and trying to make a living to support my family? But no, I have to worry that congress will bankrupt this country with the "stimulus package". I'm thinking great, now I have to go home, get on the net, and read this thing. Then I hear it's over 1000 pages long. The people who I elect to read these bills don't even have time to read it, but hey, let's just vote yes anyway. I hear that drug wars continue to spill over from Mexico and that freakin' Phoenix, AZ is the #2 city in the world for kidnappings. No need to worry about that though, we just elected the AZ gov to head homeland security. I think I've heard it said before if I can't trust you with the little responsibilities, then you just need bigger ones. No, I'm not sure if that is...

Anywho, I could go on and on. I think that you get my point.

Yes, I am a republican. I am a conservative. Above all though I am a Christian. Perhaps I need to find a new word. I heard a preacher say he asked 14 people in a week's time if they were Christians. They all said yes. He said that he needed to ask a different question.

I've toyed around with calling myself an adopted Jew. That would probably take too much of an explanation, but that I don't mind. What bothers me is that I would probably be labeled a racist. Oh well. Christian will have to do.

What I mean when I say that I am a Christian is God is the center of my world. More specifically Jesus Christ. This is the reason I don't have to worry about all the afore mentioned problems. Does that mean I can take an ostrich's view of the world? No, obviously not.

There are two traditional lines of thought here. Conservatives tend to think that with hard work and the right decisions in life, one can pull themselves up by the bootstraps. Liberals tend to believe that one's success in life does depend on working, but for some reason, luck has a part in it as well. I think that they are both wrong. Both political ideologies in a secular sense lead to the same end: achievement in this world. Liberals think that you need help beyond yourself, conservatives don't. Wait a minute. Maybe I'm more of a liberal than I thought. I know that I am stereotyping here, but for this arguments' sake, generalizations will have to do. We can hash out the details in the comments section.

I believe that there is only one God. That would make the most sense, right? Who would want to work for a company with two CEOs with equal power? A house divided cannot stand. Next, we would have to reason that this God would have to reveal himself to humanity in order to hold man accountable for knowing Him. "For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse." Romans 1:20 I know that I need to go into more thought here, but this will suffice for the purposes of my point.


What is the point of living? Why are we here? Jesus said that in order to see the kingdom of God we must become like little children. No one asks why more than a child. Why do we stop asking why? Perhaps we stop because we think we have the why figured out.



The reason why I am here is to serve God. I'm here to serve Christ. He saved me. Christ didn't come to make bad people good. He came to make dead people alive. We are dead to God. That's the problem. We are eternal. If you don't believe that ask yourself why doctors can't resurrect people. Why can't a doctor give someone who's had a heart attack a new heart and jolt him back to life? A car can sit in a field for years and I can resurrect it. A car has no soul. We do.



So why am I still here? Why can't heaven begin today? I have a job to do. I have to tell a dead world that there is life out there if they want it. I have to be specific and exclusive. All roads don't lead to Baltimore. Nor do they to God.



The world is falling. Christ knows this. He loves me. I'm His son. He has promised to take care of me. Read Luke 21. The worst thing that can happen here is that I die. This world and all that is in it is temporary, both pleasure and pain. We are meant for eternity.

Ain't Skeeeered

The other day I was driving out to check on my calves when I began to ponder how well these particular heifers were calving out. For all of you with a non-ag background a heifer is a cow that has not had her first calf. When they are bred they are commonly called first calf heifers. Calving out heifers is not just a job. It's an adventure. To say the least they are high maintenance. Bred heifers make me feel like Homer Simpson when he finds a rare caterpillar in his backyard. The EPA forces him to care for it and one of its attributes is that it's sexually attracted to fire. I think that heifers are sexually attracted to stupid.

Anywho, let's get back on point. As I began to ponder how well this heifer experience was going I began to fear to have that thought too loudly. The superstition began to creep in. Christ talked of fear frequently. "...do not fear those who kill the body, but cannot kill the soul." "Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows." Fear not was a common preamble for Jesus. What made me fear being glad calving was going well? What a ridiculous fear to have. I was behaving as though the world was ran by an omnipresent boogie man whose only goal was to make life miserable for as many people as possible. The only problem is that Mr. Boogie is incredibly inept. He can only perceive life is good if you let the cat out of the bag. "So, you like when calving time is going well, ay? I'll fix that, ha ha ha ha ha!"

As I now began to ponder Mr. Boogie instead of calving I began to realize how mentally retarded I was to think this way. I began to see how fear can rob you of your joy. I began to realize why scripture addresses fear so much. I began to understand what FDR meant.

Now, I'm not a health and wealth guy. I do know bad times will come and bad things will happen. I also know that worrying about them won't stop them. "Which one of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?" I know that I am secure in Christ. I am built upon the rock. The rain descended, floods came, and the wind blew on both houses. The difference was the foundation.

"Unless the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain who build it; unless the LORD guards the city, the watchmen stay awake in vain." Psalm 127:1

"For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:38-39

The end of me

I sit here waiting for the inspiration to come. Will today be just another day? Right now I am wishing I had a great and profound idea to share with the world. I am trying to think of some wisdom to share or some great truth God has revealed through me, but I am coming up short. God says that he loves those with a humble and contrite spirit. Perhaps that is the reason for my block. Perhaps God needs to empty me right now of myself so I can see who I am without ideas given by Him. What will I fill my vessel with today? Will I seek to make myself an enemy of God by desiring the friendship of the world? Will I be wise enough to see and to trust Him to work through me in the ordinary of today? What kind of father will I be today? What kind of husband will I be today? What kind of friend and servant will I be today? Will I waste today on me alone?

I am empty right now, but am confident I am set apart for a purpose and confident that God will work that purpose out in me today even though I can't feel or see that purpose at this moment. I know that my life is bigger than this moment as I anticipate what God will use me for today.